Hyacinths.
I named this chapter Hyacinths after the flower symbolizing forgiveness. It fits, I think.
So after the first cliffhanger in the whole story ( man I missed cliffhangers) I had some panic. Ken sees Kari. He's been avoiding everyone for a few weeks now, and for good reason. I'd probably avoid them too. But Ken doesn't run. he wants to, but running now would be turning his back on his mission of helping. He sees this as his last chance to help the digidestined. from his perspective, it is. Kari is all that is left. She's in a panic, distraught, and desperate, and Ken makes his choice- even though he want to get away and not speak to her, face her, because he feels unworthy, he stays. To do what he can.
If you notice, we never go into Kari's head in this. there are lots of pauses, but all we get from her are expressions and dialog, no thoughts, not even from the third person. that's because those will be explored in "Lead On", a two part song- story fic that I'll be writing in december.
This is the reveal chapter. From earlier chapters, we know Ken's motivations. We know exactly what and why. but he tells someone. Kari knows, and Ken faces his thoughts. Kari doesn't say much, and he's sure because she agrees- Ken honestly can't comprehend anyone thinking him worthy of being forgiven, worthy of thanks. All he can see is the red in his ledger, to paraphrase Avengers.
I don't ship Ken Kari. I don't. but their friendship is one I wished had been more explored. They have this connection to darkness, Kari because she fights it, Ken because he was drawn in and broke free. If I write another story in this timeline, if I come up with a plot, that's going to be a thing.
also, as I write this post, I'm realizing something i forgot to include again. gosh dangit. I'll work it into a one shot or something. I hope.
It was a small bit of dialog, that doesn't quite fit but that I liked, where Ken talks about how sorry he is and Kari says, 'you didn't know.' as if realizing that for the first time. and then she was going to tell him that she understood. that once a good friend of hers had fought against her, and Ken was going to say something about "I nearly killed you! I...you could have died, and I would have done it. It's not some playground bully, I was a monster, a killer." And Kari would touch Gatomon's egg and say, " so was she." and THEN Kari was going to give that line, the one that rings in Ken's ears and he doesn't understand it.
because how can she say it? This girl- he took from her her best friend, he kidnapped her, he nearly killed her, he nearly killed her best human friend, over and over she and her brother and friends came so close to death, and he's only cursed that they'd survived- how can she of all people, the girl of Light with the Angel digimon, how can she forgive him? But she does.
There's just one more chapter of this, a wrap up. I'm taking a wee break for the rest of the month (sorry) to work on NaNoWriMo, but I'll be fanficcing again come december! see you then!
